Noni the Great!

 A mother becomes a true grandmother the day she stops noticing the terrible things her children do because she is so enchanted with the wonderful things her grandchildren do.
Lois Wyse

Almost 9 years ago my mother became the smartest woman in the world - and in the same instant, ironically, all my age old, infamous adolescent sins were magically forgiven.  What earth shattering occurrence brought about these two sudden changes?  The birth of my first child, Claire Lynn.  In that moment I became a mother, and I realized a love and fear, a pride and utter confusion that completely overwhelmed me (and to be honest, still does!).  I was good for the first 3 days - primarily because we were still in the hospital and the neo-natal nurses did pretty much everything.  Then, they kicked us out, and sent my husband and I home with this new little person.  There were no instructions included, no hints as to how to proceed, and none of the nurses - not a single one of them - came home with us.

Noni with Calyn

My first phone call was to my mom.

I have always been close to both of my parents.  We've gone through what most families go through: We've struggled with our normal share of adolescent crappiness (that would be me) - the angst of re-understanding our relationship when both parties are now adults (that would be my parents), and the transformation that comes when suddenly, there are new little people in the family!  

Noni being crafty

One of my favorite things to do is to watch my children interact with my parents.  There is something magical about the relationship between a child and their grandparent - I think it shows the beauty of an indulgent love - it helps us catch yet another glimpse of how deeply our God cares for each of us!  

Our God loves us indulgently!  Our God forgives and forgives unceasingly.  Our God makes allowances and gives us second chances (and third, and fourth).  Our God sees past our messiness and sees the beautiful child of God under the dirt, and the peanut butter, and the sin.  Our God has an endless supply of hugs and stories, smiles and cheese crackers.  (Okay - I might have gone a little far with that last metaphor - but you get what I mean!)

Today, as I gather with my family to celebrate our Noni (the grandmother formerly known as 'my mom'), I thank God for the gift of my mom.  She has taught me how to always strive for excellence, how to actually finish something that I have begun, that you never quit worrying about your children, and that butter makes everything better.  And as I watch both of my parents shamelessly spoil my children, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that as good as today might be - the best is yet to come!  :)

In Honor of the Rev. Dr. T. Randall Smith

I met the infamous Rev. Dr. T. Randall Smith during my candidacy journey as I walked towards ordination in the United Methodist Church.  I was then honored to serve as his associate pastor at Deer Park United Methodist Church  from 2005-2009.  For me - Randy is a mentor, a teacher, an adopted dad, a pest, a raging United Methodist and, most importantly, a friend.  Today is Randy's birthday - so I thought I'd put together a few words to honor my old, old, really old, really-really old friend!  

The Top 10 Things I Learned from the Rev. Dr. T. Randall Smith

In honor of his birthday, May 8th

1. A completely cluttered and trashed desk does not define me or my capabilities in this world.
2. When preparing for a funeral sermon, never make a person more or less than what they were in life - speak the truth and glorify God.
3. Books were not meant to be simply read - they were meant to be devoured!
4. The communion elements should always be lifted up and elevated - Grace was meant to be seen and eaten. 
5. Liturgicalness is indeed next to Godliness!  
6. What might seem like useless facts to some can actually be valuable nuggets of wisdom to be bestowed upon unsuspecting staff members.
7. A good, cold glass of sweet tea can fix even the deepest of hurts.
8. Austin is not just our state's capitol - but a challenge, and an opportunity for God's special way of seeing and loving all of humanity to be seen in the social justice movement of those called United Methodists.  
9. I am a 'Spring' in my coloring - therefore I should always wear a white robe - it accentuates my best colors.  (Randy is a winter).  
10. There are indeed two 7 o'clocks each day - its just that one is vile and should never be encountered.

Happy Birthday my friend!  Thank you for listening to me, guiding me, teaching me, tolerating me, pushing me and being my friend!

Now you're just somebody that I used to know...

So - it has been almost 3 years since I sat down and blogged.  Pretty hard to believe!  As I look back over my amazingly witty and creative insights recorded here (no - my humbleness has not decreased in the last 3 years), I am interested in seeing how 3 years can offer a pretty dramatically different view on life.  

K3 @ Easter

My kiddos are now 8, 4 and 3.  And though we still have lots of tough times, most days I don't want to kill anyone! They are wonderful and frustrating, endearing and exhausting and I am still completely in love!  

I left the best congregation in the world, Deer Park UMC for it's rival - the other best congregation in the world - First United Methodist Church in Pearland almost a year ago.  This change has challenged me to no end!  The last year has been wonderful and frustrating, endearing and exhausting, and I am once again completely in love!  

The Kraus's are introduced to FUMC Pearland

Looking back at my blogs is like looking back at old pictures of my children.  I recognize them - I remember what we were doing and how I felt in that moment, but the specifics feel a little fuzzy.  Life has moved on, and the hugely important specifics of those moments have made way for new interests, goals and deadlines.  

Ironically, my last blog 3 years ago was about Archbishop Oscar Romero's prayer/poem in which he calls us to step back and take the long view of life.   It is SO easy to get caught up in the madness of the moment - and as a pastor mommy there are many mad moments!  I think the three year ago me needed Romero's words of wisdom, and I KNOW the today me still needs to be reminded to take the long view!  

I've learned alot over the last 3 years, about me, about ministry, about God.  And I have learned to look forward to each day, and the blessings that God has in store for me.  I can't wait to see what God has in store for me tomorrow!  Something tells me that it's gonna be wonderful and frustrating, endearing and exhausting - and I bet...I just bet...that I will still be completely in love!   

The Prayer of Oscar Romero

"It helps now and then to step back and take the long view" - wise words from Archbishop Oscar Romero. The Archbishop served the people of El Salvador and was assassinated in 1980 while he was saying mass in San Salvador.

It helps, now and then, to step back and take a long view.

The kingdom is not only beyond our efforts,
it is even beyond our vision.

We accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction
of the magnificent enterprise that is God's work.
Nothing we do is complete, which is a way of saying
that the kingdom always lies beyond us.
No statement says all that could be said.
No prayer fully expresses our faith.
No confession brings perfection.
No pastoral visit brings wholeness.
No program accomplishes the church's mission.
No set of goals and objectives includes everything.

This is what we are about.
We plant the seeds that one day will grow.
We water seeds already planted,
knowing that they hold future promise.

We lay foundations that will need further development.
We provide yeast that produces far beyond our capabilities.

We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation
in realizing that. This enables us to do something,
and to do it very well. It may be incomplete,
but it is a beginning, a step along the way,
an opportunity for the Lord's grace to enter and do the rest.

We may never see the end results, but that is the difference
between the master builder and the worker.

We are workers, not master builders; ministers, not messiahs.
We are prophets of a future not our own.
Amen.

Just another Manic Monday!

Here we go again! Monday morning hits, and our crazy routine resumes:

• wake up (after slapping the incessant alarm clock over and over again)
• get ready
• get kindergartner up and dressed and to the breakfast table
• prepare a gourmet breakfast (aka cereal)
  
• get toddler up, comfort and insert medicine as still sick
• get starving baby up (okay in reality she is already up and screaming) and pop bottle in mouth
• make lunch
• check 'take home' school folder to see what we should have done over the weekend (and obviously didn't)
• nag the child who has no sense of time until she is in the car (nice)
  
• drop off kid #1 at school
• stop and get gas (because the magic fairies didn't fill up my car while I slept once again - really fairies! help a girl out!)
• fight the roads into work
• attempt to pick up a trashed office (kid #1 spent 12 hours with me in office yesterday)
• begin to-do list
• give up on to-do list
  
• decide to blog

Okay - giving up on my 'to-do' list is not a normal part of my routine. I'm admittedly a little obsessive compulsive about getting things done. Case in point - this morning my almost 2 year old was still feeling bad. My sweet almost 6 year old decided she wanted to comfort her baby sister. (and hey, if it meant procrastinating getting ready I'm sure she saw it as a win-win).
"Claire," I said, "we have to get our job done first. Finish getting ready, and then you can love your sister."
I know, I know - awful right! I didn't mean it the way it sounded. But as I reflected on this awful parenting moment during the rest of the morning shuffle, I realized once again that my OCD is getting the best of me.
God never shows up on my 'to-do' list. My list is made up of action items. Spending time with God is not really an action kinda thing. And yet my loving God is way more important than anything else I have on my list for today or any day, just as loving her little sister was more important to Claire than getting to school on time.
So, I will learn from my kiddo today. I will do my best to have my priorities be made evident in my actions.

God before me, God behind me, God beside me, God within me, God on the top of my 'to-do' list!

Anticipation

Ely, anxiously waiting for 'wubby' (her blanket) to wash.

I realized today that I don't anticipate things the way I once did. Maybe this is just me, or a universal reality of getting older. As a child I remember that the days before Christmas were agonizingly slow - as I yearned for and dreamed of Christmas morning. The first day of school brought such excitement that I never slept the night before. Even the upcoming weekend brought a giddy anticipation as I would plan outings and fun. But now as an adult, it seems that I have outgrown the ability to be overcome in anticipation - maybe I'm too busy to anticipate!
As Christians, we both live in the midst of the Kingdom of God and anticipate the coming of the Kingdom of God. We have an 'already, but not yet' kind of existence. By its very nature the life of a Christian is a life of anticipation; Looking forward to more - a fuller life in Christ and ultimately in death an eternal life in Christ. Today, if only for a moment, I will stop and anticipate.
Christ has died, Christ has risen, Christ WILL come again!

"Life" as brought to you by Jesus

My family has been enjoying the new series "Life" on the Discovery channel.  Videographers traveled to the ends of the earth, and filmed countless hours of nature and wildlife to present this spectacular show.  In order to help fund this project, the creators have taken full advantage of corporate sponsorship.  Consequently, during the commercial breaks, the audience hears the deep voice of an announcer state, "This is Life, as brought to you by Target."  The first time I hear this I couldn't help but give a bark of indignant laughter!  Don't get me wrong, I love shopping at Target stores.  Target provides me with food, clothing and assorted sundries - but Life has been provided for me by God and God alone! 
Today is a gift - I have not earned it and I do not deserve it.  I will dedicate this day to loving Jesus!